The INSIDER Summary:
- It can be difficult to text someone you're interested in romantically.
- Although you may be worried about impressing them with your humor and depth, you should be giving some thought to your punctuation as well.
- Run-on sentences, lack of exclamation points, and too formal of language can be off-putting.
The "just talking" portion of a relationship can be a precarious time. What should be time spent getting to know each other can quickly turn into a competition of who can say the funnier thing in a wittier way. When I was "talking" to my current partner, we once spent hours exchanging texts in solely Taylor Swift lyrics. I don't even like Taylor Swift.
But we act like this because it seems that, with one wrong move, the blossoming relationship will die. If we're not our best, most funny, and well-written selves, that person we're texting is just going to ghost, and what could have been will never be.
Written communication leaves a lot of room for error, which is why it's imperative that you try to make as few mistakes a possible. And although your texting partner may forgive a few errors here and there, experts say there a some texting habits you should avoid in order to keep the relationship going.
Your writing is sloppy.
If you're worried about how you come off to a potential mate, you might want to pay closes attention to how you structure sentences. That said, you shouldn't get a proof-reader for all of your texts, psychiatrist and dating expert Scott Carroll told INSIDER.
"Formal grammar and spelling in a text suggests the author is overly-rigid and formal and may even be socially awkward," Carrol said.
It's important to write the way that a normal person would speak. So while you don't want to turn people off by typing something completely unreadable, you also don't want to come off like you're writing an English essay. Grammar mistakes are common so don't stress about "less vs. fewer" or leaving in the occasional dangling modifier.
Unless you're dating a copy editor, you should keep your tone light and conversational.
Your texts lack exclamation.
You want to keep your conversation moving and exciting, which can be difficult to do with text. Since people can't hear the intonations of voice in a text, things can come off differently than how you meant them. This is where punctuation can really shine. Don't be afraid to use exclamation points to show your interest and excitement. If you never ever use them, it can seem like you're not interested and make your texts come off cold.
"Exclamation marks are a great tool for expressing excitement and enthusiasm," online dating consultant Stacy Karyn told INSIDER. "The use of these will build an instant camaraderie and connection between you and the person you are talking to."
But of course you should use these in balance with other punctuation. If you're excited, feel free to pop one in. But not every sentence needs one, so use with caution.
You don't break things up.
The wonderful thing about swapping texts with someone is how brief your interactions can be. You should be texting in easy-to-digest correspondences, and the best way to do that is to break up sentences in a clear and concise way.
Putting in five run-on sentences in one text message is a quick way to get someone to stop talking to you. When people get texts that they have to read four or five times to really digest, they may end up realizing that talking with you is putting a lot of strain on their brain.
"Although it may be easier to leave basic punctuation out of your sentences completely, missing periods can potentially cause a wealth of misunderstandings," Karyn said. "Proper punctuation is crucial when it comes to conveying your thoughts and ideas in a text message, especially when the messages contain emotional content."
Join the conversation about this story »
NOW WATCH: Stop making the biggest mistake when it comes to texting etiquette