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Most people had the same reason for cheating on their partners — and their answer should scare you

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  • Relationships can be tough and one of the hardest things a couple can go through is infidelity.
  • Why do people cheat? There's a lot of confusion behind the heartbreak and so many questions about what changed or what could have been.
  • A study sought to answer why exactly people cheat and the most common answer is "lack of love." 

In love, there's always a risk of heartbreak. Seriously, love is a battlefield, to quote Pat Benatar, and dating can be a roller coaster of emotions. Even if you've found the one or you're ready to walk down the aisle, that doesn't mean that relationships are easy or that you're guaranteed to stay together.

One of the most painful dating experiences is being cheated on. Trusting someone and then being taken advantage of is not only unfair and hurtful, it's also confusing.

A new study is hoping to explain some of the confusion and answer the questions behind cheating.

In a study of 495 adults, originally published in “The Journal of Sex Research,” 77% of participants reported that they'd cheated due to a “lack of love.”

This means that the largest number of people had cheated simply because they'd fallen out of love with their significant other, which is a pretty heartbreaking revelation. There are so many other ways to honor and explore these feelings and the relationship, no matter which stage it's in, and without nearly as much heartbreak.

Another 70% said that they'd cheated due to feeling neglected, while 70% of others said that cheating had happened while they were drunk.

Some said they cheated out of anger and others said they were hoping to quell a low self-esteem.

These findings echo previous research, that found that women in both the United States and Europe had cheated because they felt that their partner had stopped giving them the attention they needed. Conversely, when people who identified as men were asked the same question, however, they said that the top reason they cheated was that the person they cheated with was attractive.

Here's the thing: even if you've been privy to the warning signs and discovered someone cheating, going through the subsequent pain that follows betrayal, it doesn't have to be all bad. No matter why your partner cheated, there are ways that you can move forward.

In the end, cheating hurts, but it can also be a good thing. It can be a sign to separate from your partner and move on with someone else who will value you or it can mean that it's time to evaluate your roles in your relationship and grow with one another. You might just be better off.

Dating can be a lot. It's risky. It can mean arguing, laughing, cheating, and even growing despite the heartbreak. It could mean being with the wrong person or finding someone who's totally right for you. No matter what, it's good to communicate, to remain open, and to be aware of each other's feelings. It might just save everyone the heartbreak of infidelity.

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