Think back to your teenage years and all of the wild and just-not-true things you used to believe about sex.
There seems to be an endless amount of myths and urban legends when it comes to sex. Unfortunately, these fabrications are what muddies up the water when it comes to helping couples with intimacy issues and they can stay with us into adulthood.
That’s why INSIDER reached out to a few experts to help debunk some of the more common sex myths.
Myth: All orgasms feel the same — and they should be explosive.
Truth: Kait Scalisi, MPH, intimacy educator and founder ofPassionbyKait.com, told INSIDER that orgasms exist on a spectrum from whisper quiet to mind-blowing. "No sensation feels the same all the time," she said. Lots of factors play into how your body processes sensation, whether that's pleasure, pain, or anything else.
Myth: What you do during sex determines how good your sex life is.
Truth: "Most of what matters for sex has nothing to do with sex itself," Scalisi told INSIDER. Instead, she explained that it's about creating the right context for intimate, exciting, and fulfilling sex.
For most people, Scalisi said that context is high trust, low stress, and high affection. "By reducing the things in your life that turn you off, you're generally more easily able to enjoy the moment and find freedom in pleasure."
Myth: If you're aroused, you shouldn't need lubricant.
Truth: Needing more lubrication than your body produces doesn't mean you're not aroused.Dr. Ava Cadell, clinical sexologist and AASECT certified sex counselor, told INSIDER that a lot of people equate wetness with how turned on they are, but that’s not necessarily an accurate barometer.
"Your monthly cycle, pregnancy, illness, menopause, medications (such antihistamines and decongestants) can affect lubrication, no matter how much water you drink," she shared. Cadell even suggests lube when using condoms since latex doesn’t slide well even if you're naturally lubricated.
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