- Whether you’re in the honeymoon phase or you and your partner just can't seem to leave the bedroom, you might be wondering if there's such a thing as too much sex.
- The good news is, as long as you are happy and comfortable physically and emotionally, you can enjoy as much sex as you want.
- But there are certainly uncomfortable physical situations that can arise from having too much sex— here’s what you should look out for.
Each person’s definition of a good sex life is different, and while some people are perfectly fine to rarely have sex, others prefer to have it multiple times a day.
Still, you might be wondering if it’s possible to have too much sex. Whether you’re in the honeymoon phase with a new partner, on vacation enjoying getaway sex thanks to all that extra free time, or point-blank love having a lot of sex, you might wonder how much is too much for your body and mind to handle.
The good news is, as long as both you and your partners are happy and comfortable, there really is no such thing as too much sex.
"There’s no limit to the amount of sex anyone can have, but there are physical issues that might leave you a little, shall we say, uncomfortable days later," Diana Bitner, M.D., an OB/GYN told Women’s Health Magazine. Even though you can have as much sex as you’re comfortable with, there are plenty of surefire signs that your body has had enough.
The first obvious sign is vaginal dryness. If things are feeling dry down below, it might be because your body has experienced too much prolonged contact or penetration. When this happens, tiny micro-tears in the vagina can occur, which can be seriously painful.
"Vaginal tears can happen with too much sex, especially if there are any other conditions such as vaginal dryness from low dose birth control pills," said Dr. Bitner.
"Too much" sex can cause a urinary tract or vaginal infection if you're not careful.
Sherry Ross, M.D., an OB/GYN and women’s health expert in Santa Monica, California agreed, noting that the more sex you have in a short amount of time, the less natural moisture your body is able to produce.
"This typically causes friction and pain, which is your body’s signal to press pause," she told Women's Health Magazine.
Too much sex can also cause irritation, chafing, or rashes on the external skin around the vulva, and your labia can become engorged and swollen, added Dr. Bitner.
Another unpleasant side effect of too much sex is an increase in the risk of bladder and vaginal infections, particularly in women. Bodily fluids can knock your vagina’s natural pH levels out of whack making you more susceptible to infection.
You should always use the bathroom before and after sex to help keep your vagina healthy, but too much intercourse can still cause an infection, and you might not notice until days later.
"Semen has a pH of seven, which can support unhealthy bacteria within the vagina,"said Dr. Bitner. "That combined with too much friction from sex could increase the chance of bacteria from the vagina and anus finding their way into the bladder causing a urinary tract infection [UTI]."
According to Prevention, common signs of an infection include increased urge to urinate with little or nothing coming out, burning, and urine that is cloudy, pink, or has blood in it, as well as unusual discharge, pain, or odors. But these symptoms don’t always appear, so check with your doctor if you’re not sure.
People with penises can experience physical symptoms as well.
People with penises can also experience pain, irritation, and soreness from too much sex.
"When people ejaculate eight-10 times over the weekend from Friday to Sunday, it’s going to cause some pain and discomfort when you go to that extreme amount," said Jonthan D. Schiff, M.D., assistant clinical professor of urology at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai Hospital in New York City, to Muscle and Fitness.
"It’s like anything else. If you’re doing an activity steadily, your body will be able to tolerate it when you push it more,"said Dr. Schiff.
Communication with your partner is key.
Aside from the potential for unpleasant physical symptoms, there’s also the psychological aspects of having "too much sex." Certified sex therapist Kat Van Kirk told Brides magazine, "One or more partners may feel overwhelmed by the expectation to perform sexually more than the other and this can cause withdrawal and resentment."
You should be regularly checking in with your partner — and yourself — to ensure that the amount of sex you’re having is what you’re both happy with.
"Using sex as a way to resolve problems in the relationship in lieu of talking about them might be a way that a couple uses sex to avoid the actual work of the relationship," sex expert Madeleine Castellanos, M.D, told Brides. She added that while "sex is a source of pleasure and vitality and it's natural to have a strong drive for it if you find that you look for sex compulsively, you may be using sex as an outlet for something else."
Though compulsive sexual behaviors and sex addiction as a psychiatric disorder is a hotly debated topic by researchers and medical experts, only you and your partner can determine if your sexual patterns are interfering with your life in a problematic way. Dr. Castellanos added, "if stuff is not getting done — like cleaning the house, going to work, or taking care of your basic needs — in order to have sex, then it's probably too much sex."
When it comes down to it, the choice is up to you.
How much sex you have is entirely up to you — whether that means daily, weekly, monthly, or never at all.
"When it comes to the frequency of sex, each person has their preference, which is then limited by their schedule, their sleep pattern, and of course, their partner's availability … Couples will find their own ebb and flow. There will be times of more sex and times of less. The most important thing is to stay connected and communicate so that you can weather and enjoy wherever you are on the spectrum," Dr. Castellanos told Brides.
Communication is the most important aspect to a healthy sex life, so be sure to check in with your partner and with yourself to ensure you’re on the same page and enjoying the amount of sexual activity that you feel comfortable with.
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